But first, here is a neat idea for a family time – I wish we could have known about this when our big boys were young, but it works great for all ages honestly, if they are willing.  We did this with 4 other couples and it was really fun!  Check it out here:  One Big Happy Home.

Our kids have a pesky habit of continuing to grow and mature!  Darn!  😉  While I do miss the little snuggle bodies it’s great to realize they are moving forward and creating lives for themselves!  So here is a quick update on everyone.

Sissy will turn 9 this summer.  Still going to school with Daddy.  We looked into an IEP but just learned she doesn’t qualify.  They did identify some issues for us – one of them being a visual processing disorder.  That explains why she keeps saying she wants glasses and things don’t look right but the eye doctor says her eyes are perfect.  So if you follow me on Pinterest don’t be surprised to see more of that in my feed as I try to learn all I can to help her.  Thankfully Grammy is living in our home now so there are more helpers and we are so thankful!

J3 finished his first year of high school and without me here!  We were blessed to transition to an Independent study program and still able to homeschool him.  Kelley is much more than a teacher to our family and we are so blessed by her help!  He was frustrated to find out 15.5 yr olds don’t usually get the jobs so he’s focused on getting his license and then the job!  He’s headed to AZ again this summer to work on the Navajo reservation as a ministry.  He’s also the tallest in our family now – well he and Dad are still competing for that title…but I think Dad needs to realize it’s over. LOL

J2 (19) is working at Sonic now.  His bike finally bit the dust (probably due to getting hit by a car about a year ago) and thankfully he’d saved enough for a new one.  The job is only part time but that might be enough for him.  He’s been working with DOR and a local agency but this was a job he got on his own. Not one I thought he’d enjoy due to the noise and stress but he washes lots of dishes and that is probably helps him when things get overwhelming.

J1 (21) and two of his friends are – Lord willing – headed to Utah to attend Job Corps.  In the interim, they are camping in our back yard. Yep, that is 9 people in our house!  We are all equal parts hoping they go soon and missing him already.  He’s doing better in so many areas and we pray it is a very good thing for him!

Eric and I have been doing lots of homework/training in order to teach other parents the Empowered to Connect concepts that we have found to be such a blessing for our family. He continues to teach at Neighborhood Christian School and I am working full-time outside the home too.  I am a branch office administrator for Edward Jones. I truly love my job. I’m still leading Knit Night on Tuesdays at the local library too. Eric’s been involved in several local political groups but had to step back a bit to complete the training.

So, since this has taken me several sit down attempts to complete, I’d better end it sooner than later!

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I found this book while looking for books on reactive attachment disorder (RAD) which is a diagnosis that has affected our family. As I read this story I was just amazed at how much the author’s story was similar to our child’s story.

I realize there is a lot of controversy about RAD and I’m not even sure if I accept it as a diagnosis.  But I so appreciated this view from the other side.   Our story was so similar that at times I had to stop reading so I could start breathing again.

You can clearly trace how the trauma, neglect and loss in the author’s life created an environment where he couldn’t trust anyone and eventually stopped trying.  But his parents kept trying (they obviously got some of the same advice we were given) to help him.  Finally he ended up out of their home and realized he was responsible for how he handled his anger and disappointment.

The book made me sad in that I didn’t see his relationship with his parents really improved but I do see it in our family so I hope he finds that too.  He does recognize they did their best and that is something I pray our son realizes too.

This is my first post in the Adoption Talk Link Up.  Every first and third  Thursday of the month bloggers in the adoption triad post and link up on various topics. Today’s topic was “Anything Goes”.  Click on the graphic below to read more!

No Bohns About It

My brain is so full of thoughts after yesterday’s training – and of course, today is Resurrection Sunday and all that involves – but I really hope I can share some of the highlights from yesterday’s training and bless someone as I was blessed!

To say the training was intimate is an understatement. I think there were 15 in attendance. I was sorry they didn’t do introductions since there were so few, but I gathered a couple were workers, a few were foster parents and the rest were adoptive parents.  Most of us had a working knowledge of FASD but I definitely think – if you like with someone on the Fetal Alcohol spectrum, you would do best to revisit any training you can get as often as you can.

First a few links. The training was hosted by the FASD Norcal group: http://www.fasdnorcal.org/  Back in 2014 I was involved in early discussions and met with some people to convey the great need for local support groups.  Sadly, at this time, the only groups I am aware of are in the Bay Area. But Eric and I are praying about starting something more local for us!

And, our trainer was Jeff Noble.  His website is FASDForever at http://fasdforever.com/ He has a newsletter, ebooks and a youtube channel.  He is a former house parent, foster parent and FASD educator in Canada.  Personally he has been an encouragement to my husband especially on Facebook and through his writings.

A few snippets that stood out to me during the day:

“They have the most unpredictable brains on the planet.”

“(They) look normal, talk normal, act disabled”

“Everyone has a brain. Everyone’s brain is different and normal for them.”

‘I’m bored’ can be translated ‘I don’t know what to do next.’

90% of our kiddos acquire anxiety or depression.

I’m realizing there is really too much to share in one post and I have some things I need to dig into a bit more in my own journey so I’ll be writing more later.  If you have questions, please don’t hesitate to ask.  I was extremely blessed to get to ask Jeff some questions I’ve been struggling with and I can’t wait to share more of what I learned!