We are a family created through adoption. 4 of our 5 children are adopted and, though they came to our family at different times, they are a sibling group.

About 5 years ago I started to write our adoption story and now I’m going to take some time and finish it. It will take me a bit, but here are the first 4 parts for you to catch up: Part 1 :: Part 2 :: Part 3 :: Part 4 ::

I’m mainly posting this for accountability to get this done! 😉 Here we go!

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For several years I haven’t been to do much reading. Maybe it was the mental space required to keep going that simply didn’t allow new thoughts to enter my brain and stay there or maybe it was the fact that I was falling asleep as soon as I got into bed.  Either way, if it wasn’t Agatha Christie or some little bit of fluff, it just wasn’t getting much attention.

But now I’m wanting craving reading time!  And, between my Kindle and my iPad, I have quite a queue of good books to read!  Here is a list for me to keep track of what I want to read!

  • Beyond Consequences, Logic, and Control – volumes one and two, by Heather Forbes
  • Shepherding a Child’s Heart, (reread) by Tedd Tripp
  • Instructing a Child’s Heart, by Tedd & Margy Tripp
  • Adoptive Parent Intentional Parent, by Stacy Manning
  • Hope for the Weary Mom, (reread by Stacey Thacker & Brooke McGlothin
  • What’s It like to be Married to me?: and Other Dangerous Questions, by Linda Dillow
  • Forgotten God, Francis Chan
  • Erasing Hell, Francis Chan

So, this might take longer than my Summer will allow!

What are you reading? Got any book recommendations I should consider adding to my list?

Last night I was reading the Urban Servant blog, and she recommended a book.  I instantly  bought it!

Yes, seriously.

I’ve been so encouraged to keep doing what we are doing after finding Urban Servant’s blog.  So, when she said that this was the book she could have written and “It’s seriously the best thing I have ever read on embracing the challenge of raising RAD/FASD/PTSD kiddos.” I knew it would be an encouragement to me!

51AWg9S6KWL._BO2,204,203,200_PIsitb-sticker-arrow-click,TopRight,35,-76_SX285_SY380_CR,0,0,285,380_SH20_OU01_Yes, I borrowed this image from Amazon – linked to this book – $9.99 on Kindle, $17.99 if you are a true book lover who hates trees! 😉 LOL

This doesn’t seem to be so much a new way of thinking for us, but validation of what we are already trying to do!  Which is so helpful!  We tried to do what the experts told us and that was a disaster that we are only now feeling we have left behind us (please Lord!).  This book is saying the same thing our hearts were telling us was necessary for our kiddos!

If you are an adoptive parent, foster parent or caretaker of an adoptive child – regardless of the circumstances of the adoption – please consider reading this book! I don’t think you will be disappointed!

 

Many of you know we have been having a very rough time in our home for many years.  We love our kids to bits, but they aren’t easy to parent.  Over time you start to believe that these struggles are your fault.  And this is reinforced by every book, every ‘helper’, everyone who doesn’t understand what you are living with.  Hell, you don’t understand it, how can someone outside your home understand it.

Yes, there are labels, but a label doesn’t come with a fix or an answer.  And, there are medications, but those don’t always help but might, in fact, cause bigger problems.

Sometimes I feel so alone.  I honestly quit sharing because I was tired of the ‘just love/pray/believe/do/try more’ comments.  And, then I stumbled upon some blogs during the darkest days that helped me realize I am not alone.

One of those blog writers wrote a blog this week that I really needed to hear.  You can read it here.  Today I am praying that the Lord takes away all the advice I’ve been given about parenting my kids from my mind and that I only hear Him.  That He removes all the guilt. And my need for resolution.  That He allow me to remember that I can’t do anything without His strength.  That I see this life as freedom and not bondage.  That I don’t worry about those helper voices who don’t live with my children and don’t realize how damaging their advice has been.

Please read the post if you want to understand. I can’t express my heart today.

For the last 9 mos, my eldest has been spending almost every weekend, most parts of every holiday with a friend in Sacramento. This has given us all respite and a it’s been needed. Today that changes. After today he is spending most of his time with this friend’s family and will be visiting here instead. 🙁

I think it would be easier if he was going off to a school or Job Corps. I’d feel like that was a step forward. But this is a step sideways at best. This is admitting that we can’t live together…that he’s better away from us. 🙁 That hurts.

It seems like only yesterday we were bringing him home and showing him his room and his toys. I remember the first time he called me Momma.

But it’s been hard for a long time. My head understands why this is a good thing for ALL of us, but my heart does not! I just wish love HAD been enough to help him.