This is the last part of our adoption story. The boys’ sister was born July 23, 2007 – J1 was 12.5, J2 was 10 and J3 was 6.5. I had been blogging for about 4 years now so much of her adoption story played out here as it happened.
This was our first adoption living in another state. That might have been why it took longer to have JGirl join our family but also, for the first time, the kids’ tummy mommy didn’t disappear. She was no better equipped to parent a child – much less care for herself – but they gave her a chance to try to prove she could. It was hard to wait. I hated the fact that her failure meant our gain. But really she didn’t have a chance. We know enough of her story to wish she had been given the chance of adoption. The chance to have a loving family who would help her realize she was worthy of so much more! 🙁 We made her a weather-proof photo album of the boys that would hopefully stand up to the rigors of her life.
In Oregon they have a registry for adoptees. If our kiddos want to reconnect with their birth family they can put their contact info in the registry. If their birth family does the same they will be connected. So far those old enough have not been interested. But we’ll see what happens in the future. However, I worry unless her lifestyle changes, she won’t be available to meet. 🙁
Our kids are now 21, 19, 15 and 8. My husband and I have learned so much about trauma, loss and the affects on the brain. We started to learn about TBRI from Empowered to Connect and last summer we were blessed to attend the NACAC conference in Long Beach, CA and hear Dr. Daniel Siegel – it was so encouraging and informative! We have made it past some of the hardest days with our oldest and want to help other families who find themselves in those circumstances.