You know what the best Valentine’s day present I received today? Watching J2 (who has severe learning disabilities) playing hangman in church with his friends. Yes, I’d rather he be listening, but I never thought he’d even try to play a game that requires him to spell words! It was super-exciting to me!
And, not only that – but he won! 😉
When you knead bread you have lots of time to think…Â (**could be Lost spoilers – Cheryl, this is your only warning! ;-)Â You can’t read this post until Saturday!)
The word was “resistance”.
I’m pretty sure he planned to type “Resistance is futile.” (Pretty funny in itself I think! lol)
But what he wrote – and what I enjoyed chuckling about:
Resistance is fatal.
LOL
Well, I just waved goodbye to J3 and Daddy as they left for school. Not only was J3 up early today, but he showered and went to bed without complaint last night! I’m trying to be happy for him as he is thrilled to be back with his friends. But I’m so frustrated! I want him here with me! But just wanting something to be a certain way isn’t enough reason to keep doing something that isn’t working. It wasn’t that homeschooling wasn’t working – it was! But J1 has really directed a lot of his anger at J3. The name calling, the shoving, and all the unpleasantness – it just was not working out.
My head knows that giving the two of them some distance is a good thing. My head is VERY, very thankful that we have an option for him to be with Daddy in a wonderful Christ-centered school at no cost to our family. My head recognizes that as much as I want to homeschool everyone – I truly have my hands full with J1 and J2’s special needs. And, now that we are most likely going to be adding more appts to our week, I’ll be running around even more.
But my heart is sad. It wants to keep trying. It wants all my little chicks safely in my view. It wants to believe that I will somehow develop supermom skills to simultaneously change a diaper, refree a disagreement, teach phonics, prepare the science experiment, clean house, update my work spreadsheet…and all with a song on my lips and a smile on my face. My heart needs a reality check!
…to put J3 back into the Christian school where Hubs teaches. I’m sad about it, but he has become the chicken that all the bigger chickens peck and peck. We are blessed with an option for him which, for him, is a wonderful, positive place.
But I’m still sad. He is often the bright spot of my day and now I’ll have less time with him. I have at least one more week before he goes back to school* and I plan to make the best of it! (*returning him at the end of the first quarter)
:(Â Sometimes it’s hard to do something even though you think it is the best thing.
