Another seasonal trigger

This morning I woke up and realized I was full of dread.

I reviewed my day – what was the trigger? But I didn’t see it.

I reflected on my life and relationships – was there something I needed to give attention?

But again, there wasn’t anything obvious.

As I was standing in my kitchen looking at the grey sky and feeling the cool breeze come in the window, I realized that September is going to be another trigger for me.  Due to the years of stress and emotional trauma – the worst of which happened in September- I need to recognize that the echos of that time of life can suck me into an unhealthy place.  I don’t want to live there anymore.  I need to remember that is not what life is like now and let God carry me.

I need to make healthy choices even though all I want to do is curl up in a ball and sleep.  I need to be sure and eat healthy even though all I want is comfort food.  I need to stay in the Word, even though all I want to do is stay disengaged and get through these days as quickly as possible.  I need to work hard to be present, even though I want to avoid any relationships that might hurt me.

I’ve got my work cut out for me!