It’s been over six years since Joshua died.
After the funeral someone (my sister, my husband, my mom, me???) boxed up all his blankets, clothes, toys, and whatever reminded us of him.
The 4 tubs were at my mom’s house for the first couple of years. Then we put them in storage and now they are in our garage.
Until today.
Right now my MIL and Hubs are sorting through everything to either keep as a momento or give to charity. I’ve tried to do it many times but I couldn’t. I still can’t. I’m in here hiding because I can’t handle whatever is in those boxes. But I also hate knowing they are out there too. We just don’t have room to store them forever and it really doesn’t seem healthy to hold onto them for no purpose. So I’ll be glad when it’s done.
It’s like a bandaid that’s been on too long. I need it to be taken off but I am afraid of the pain that will come with it’s removal. Right now I just want them to hurry up and rip it off already.
oh sweetie, wish i was there to give you a big hug right now, praying for you right this second!
We have those boxes, too. I’m so sorry and I will pray for you.
Sending hugs and prayers. I am so sorry.
We want you to know that we are there with you, you are not alone. Love, Dad
I’m glad that you’re not having to do this yourself. Saying extra prayers for you right now!
Amy, praying for you today. Hopefully, in the midst of the boxes will be some things that bring a smile of remembrance to your face.
Big hugs to you Amy.
Lord, I pray that you will comfort Amy right now, give her tender love right now, and peace. In yours Sons name, Amen.
I can’t even imagine how hard it would be… I don’t think I could give the stuff away… 🙁
Oh Amy, I just saw this on my bloglines. Just reading it makes me want to go hide in my own closet. I am not good at letting things go. I pray that God will comfort you, and bring even more healing.
The odd thing about it is, once the band-aid is ripped off, relief sets in. I had the same feelings when confronted with going through my parents’ things after their deaths in 2006. We were VERY close. I felt like I was betraying them to even consider giving away something of theirs. The fear of confronting what was in the closets, boxes and drawers was just that–fear. Fear is False Evidence Appearing Real. Yes, I broke down. Yes, it hurt at first. Horrendously, profoundly, in a way I thought I wouldn’t be able to stand. But as I sorted, as I confronted, a peace settled over me. There is only one way to get through the pain–allow yourself to go through it, then allow in the relief. When you come out on the other side, you’ll be stronger for it.
God never gives us more than we can handle. He’s with you, right beside you while you face this insurmountable task. He knows your pain and fear, and He’ll bring comfort to you when you ask. Be at peace. {{{hugs}}}
Hug! Praying for you.
Hugs Amy!
Love you!
Obviously I have not been to your blog in a few days! Sorry. I have had this person on “hold” to make a quilt out of some of Joshie’s clothing, blankets, or whatever you would like. Is this something I can do for you????